Well, the doctor (surgeon?) with whom I was supposed to have a follow-up today got back from vacation and cleared his afternoons for the week, so my appointment was rescheduled for Saturday. Now, I know that infertility treatment often involves weekend appointments, but I would prefer not to have weekend appointments unless they're absolutely necessary. But that's the next available appointment, and I don't want to put surgery off for too long, so I'm taking it.
I've been keeping up on my OPKs still. I guess I forgot to tell my husband, because he cleaned the bathroom and threw away my pee cup. I think he was a little taken aback when I came into the kitchen demanding to know where my pee cup was. He told me he thought it was for drinking and he threw it away. I really hope he didn't use it to drink water out of! Anyway, yesterday was cycle day... 10. I had to stop for a second and count. I forgot to pee until 10 last night, and I'm trying to keep it between 5 and 6 in the evening, but I completely forgot. Anyway, no positive yet. I know it doesn't matter, but it would be nice to know that I'm doing SOMETHING right.
So now I have to wait until Saturday. Ugh.
Edit: Well, they called and rescheduled my appointment AGAIN. It's tomorrow! Yay! Hopefully I'll have more answers soon! Must remember to print out my AMH results tonight, as they have apparently gone astray...
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
Friday, September 5, 2014
Well, that was somewhat reassuring
I had my RE appointment on Wednesday. My husband wasn't able to come with me, which turned out to be ok. The appointment went fairly well, I suppose. The doctor agreed that my FSH was higher than ideal, but he didn't think it would pose a huge problem, so that made me feel a bit better. He did an ultrasound and showed me my innards (it looks like black blobs with white lines; I couldn't even figure out what he was looking at when he was counting follicles). My ovaries are both there (yay!) and between them I had 9 follicles (which I think is good).
The biggest issue, and what he thinks is causing our problems, is that I have several fibroids, none of which is particularly large, but at least one of which is in a spot that is probably making conceiving quite difficult. He suggested removing it, without even doing a hysteroscopy to take a look around first considering how long it can take to schedule surgery (5-6 weeks) and how old I am (I don't want to talk about it). So I have a follow-up on Tuesday with the doctor who will likely be doing the actual surgery, so he can take a second look and make sure going straight to surgery is a good idea. Considering all of the tests I've had in the past, including ultrasounds with a full bladder (so much fun!) and a hysteroscopy 4 years ago, I have a feeling surgery will be a go and sometime in late October these damn fibroids that make my life so miserable every month will finally be gone. I can't wait!
Even if we never end up having a child, I'm hoping that removing the fibroids will at the very least result in much more reasonable periods.
So I'm not suffering from PCOS, and my ovaries aren't QUITE that old and dried-up (although the doctor did say there are some clinics who wouldn't even try helping me because my FSH results would risk their stellar success records), and I can actually do something about what is likely to be the main problem, and I'm feeling pretty good about it. I'm just hoping I can get an appointment that's not the day before Halloween (they do surgeries on Thursdays), so I can try to enjoy it a bit this year. As soon as I figure out my costume.
Edit: I forgot to mention ovulation. I mentioned it to the doctor. He told me it didn't really matter whether I'm ovulating or not, because once the fibroid(s) is/are gone, the medication I'll be on will make me ovulate either way. And he doesn't really trust the at-home kits anyway. So I'll continue testing for my own scientific purposes, and not worry about the results.
The biggest issue, and what he thinks is causing our problems, is that I have several fibroids, none of which is particularly large, but at least one of which is in a spot that is probably making conceiving quite difficult. He suggested removing it, without even doing a hysteroscopy to take a look around first considering how long it can take to schedule surgery (5-6 weeks) and how old I am (I don't want to talk about it). So I have a follow-up on Tuesday with the doctor who will likely be doing the actual surgery, so he can take a second look and make sure going straight to surgery is a good idea. Considering all of the tests I've had in the past, including ultrasounds with a full bladder (so much fun!) and a hysteroscopy 4 years ago, I have a feeling surgery will be a go and sometime in late October these damn fibroids that make my life so miserable every month will finally be gone. I can't wait!
Even if we never end up having a child, I'm hoping that removing the fibroids will at the very least result in much more reasonable periods.
So I'm not suffering from PCOS, and my ovaries aren't QUITE that old and dried-up (although the doctor did say there are some clinics who wouldn't even try helping me because my FSH results would risk their stellar success records), and I can actually do something about what is likely to be the main problem, and I'm feeling pretty good about it. I'm just hoping I can get an appointment that's not the day before Halloween (they do surgeries on Thursdays), so I can try to enjoy it a bit this year. As soon as I figure out my costume.
Edit: I forgot to mention ovulation. I mentioned it to the doctor. He told me it didn't really matter whether I'm ovulating or not, because once the fibroid(s) is/are gone, the medication I'll be on will make me ovulate either way. And he doesn't really trust the at-home kits anyway. So I'll continue testing for my own scientific purposes, and not worry about the results.
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
It's that time of the month again
Just got back from a mostly lovely labor day weekend in the mountains. We ended up coming home a little early because the dogs tore a hole in the tent, but overall it was a really nice weekend, and I'm happy I had the opportunity to spend some time outdoors.
We ended up leaving early due to the tent issue. It's a 4.5-5 hour drive, and we left at 8:15 pm. I hadn't had very much to drink yet (I was cooking, so I was waiting until campfire time) so I ended up driving first. Even though I had taken quite a few painkillers, my cramps were so bad that I ended up pulling over on the side of the freeway so my husband could drive. It was awful. I'm not enjoying the return of 3 days of excruciating cramps, although the extremely heavy bleeding has not returned. I don't know if I should be happy or worried about this. I guess I'll talk to the doctor when I go in tomorrow.
I'm getting a little frustrated with friends who I've talked to about my infertility problems. Most of them are the exact opposite of helpful, and say things like "well, remember X and Y who had problems and then they got pregnant the old-fashioned way in a few months? I'm sure you just need more time!" Right. Because having slow sperm when you're 31 is the same as having dried-up old eggs when you're 36. I think it's time to stop confiding in people. My husband wants to talk to everyone about it, and in theory I'm on board with more openness, but telling people we're having problems makes them think that the problems are solvable. I'm not quite ready to tell people that my 3-day FSH level was high, which means bad things for my eggs. That kind of detail seems a bit TMI.
Anyway, for my records, here's how this period is going:
Days -5 through -7: spotting (light)
Days -4 through day 0: nothing!
Day 0 (Friday): nothing! (should have been day 1, but whatever)
Day 1 (Saturday): Period starts mid-morning, very mild cramping. Take lots of painkillers, cramping ramps up during the night
Day 2 (Sunday): Tons of blood in the morning. Take lots of painkillers, cramping subsides until evening. Take more painkillers, cramping is TERRIBLE. Bleeding stops mid-afternoon.
Day 3 (Monday): Lots of cramping that tapers off towards evening. Very little blood, none in the evening at all.
Day 4 (Tuesday): No blood overnight, but heavier bleeding this morning. Some cramping, but tapers off after painkillers.
OK. Whew.
We ended up leaving early due to the tent issue. It's a 4.5-5 hour drive, and we left at 8:15 pm. I hadn't had very much to drink yet (I was cooking, so I was waiting until campfire time) so I ended up driving first. Even though I had taken quite a few painkillers, my cramps were so bad that I ended up pulling over on the side of the freeway so my husband could drive. It was awful. I'm not enjoying the return of 3 days of excruciating cramps, although the extremely heavy bleeding has not returned. I don't know if I should be happy or worried about this. I guess I'll talk to the doctor when I go in tomorrow.
I'm getting a little frustrated with friends who I've talked to about my infertility problems. Most of them are the exact opposite of helpful, and say things like "well, remember X and Y who had problems and then they got pregnant the old-fashioned way in a few months? I'm sure you just need more time!" Right. Because having slow sperm when you're 31 is the same as having dried-up old eggs when you're 36. I think it's time to stop confiding in people. My husband wants to talk to everyone about it, and in theory I'm on board with more openness, but telling people we're having problems makes them think that the problems are solvable. I'm not quite ready to tell people that my 3-day FSH level was high, which means bad things for my eggs. That kind of detail seems a bit TMI.
Anyway, for my records, here's how this period is going:
Days -5 through -7: spotting (light)
Days -4 through day 0: nothing!
Day 0 (Friday): nothing! (should have been day 1, but whatever)
Day 1 (Saturday): Period starts mid-morning, very mild cramping. Take lots of painkillers, cramping ramps up during the night
Day 2 (Sunday): Tons of blood in the morning. Take lots of painkillers, cramping subsides until evening. Take more painkillers, cramping is TERRIBLE. Bleeding stops mid-afternoon.
Day 3 (Monday): Lots of cramping that tapers off towards evening. Very little blood, none in the evening at all.
Day 4 (Tuesday): No blood overnight, but heavier bleeding this morning. Some cramping, but tapers off after painkillers.
OK. Whew.
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
Day 27
No ovulation. Either I ovulated before day 12 (I suppose it's possible, right?) or I haven't ovulated at all. Or the strips I bought are faulty. I'm going with not ovulating at all. Hooray! I'm broken!
My husband is very excited that his tests all came back good. I keep trying to explain to him that having high quality sperm doesn't really matter if there isn't an egg to fertilize, but I'm not sure he gets it.
We got a bill from my old healthcare provider for $500 for the first round of tests, before I switched to an HMO. I was not expecting that. Yay for medical bills! And the doctor I saw didn't even bother to test for FSH, and didn't seem to think that ovulating on day 25 was a problem (assuming that ovulation did in fact occur, considering the only charting method I was using at the time was bbt). I hate it when I know more than my doctor. And I get to pay $500 for the privilege!
And, just to put icing on the cake, I got an email from some friends who are older than me and who just drive me CRAZY. (as an example of why - they expected me to do a TON of work for their wedding, which I happily did, and then they presented me with a bill for my share of the costs. When I asked for a little bit of help for their wedding, they asked me to pay for their room. (and I mean a LITTLE bit of work - basically, start and stop the music at the wedding, that's it) WHO DOES THAT???). Surprise! They're having a girl! Yay for them!
Honestly, I'm very happy for most of my friends who are having kids. But there are some people I have a hard time getting excited for.
First real doctor's appointment in one week. One more opportunity for some guy I don't know to stick random things in my lady parts. Awesome.
My husband is very excited that his tests all came back good. I keep trying to explain to him that having high quality sperm doesn't really matter if there isn't an egg to fertilize, but I'm not sure he gets it.
We got a bill from my old healthcare provider for $500 for the first round of tests, before I switched to an HMO. I was not expecting that. Yay for medical bills! And the doctor I saw didn't even bother to test for FSH, and didn't seem to think that ovulating on day 25 was a problem (assuming that ovulation did in fact occur, considering the only charting method I was using at the time was bbt). I hate it when I know more than my doctor. And I get to pay $500 for the privilege!
And, just to put icing on the cake, I got an email from some friends who are older than me and who just drive me CRAZY. (as an example of why - they expected me to do a TON of work for their wedding, which I happily did, and then they presented me with a bill for my share of the costs. When I asked for a little bit of help for their wedding, they asked me to pay for their room. (and I mean a LITTLE bit of work - basically, start and stop the music at the wedding, that's it) WHO DOES THAT???). Surprise! They're having a girl! Yay for them!
Honestly, I'm very happy for most of my friends who are having kids. But there are some people I have a hard time getting excited for.
First real doctor's appointment in one week. One more opportunity for some guy I don't know to stick random things in my lady parts. Awesome.
Thursday, August 21, 2014
I don't even know how to title this
Day 21. As of yesterday, no ovulation. This morning I had spotting. Well, more like quite a bit of old blood. None of this seems quite right. Luckily, my husband did his part of the testing this morning (FINALLY!) and I turned in our new patient questionnaire last night, so help is on the way! Assuming, of course, that we're not already beyond help.
I suppose it's possible (but it seems highly unlikely) that I ovulated before day 12, the day when I first started testing. Maybe next cycle I'll get more test strips and start testing earlier. Hopefully one of these days soon I'll get to see an actual doctor!
I suppose it's possible (but it seems highly unlikely) that I ovulated before day 12, the day when I first started testing. Maybe next cycle I'll get more test strips and start testing earlier. Hopefully one of these days soon I'll get to see an actual doctor!
Monday, August 18, 2014
The missing O
I'm currently tracking my ovulation using an OPK. Well, I would be tracking it if it actually happened. Today is CD 18. I haven't tested yet today, but it hasn't happened yet, and I'm really hoping today is the day.
I'm beginning to suspect that I might have low progesterone. Unfortunately, I can't talk to anyone about any of this until my husband does his test, and for some reason he isn't making it a very high priority. I realize going to the lab takes time and effort, but I've done it SO MANY TIMES lately I'm having a hard time feeling any sympathy for him. We both work full time - why is it so hard for him?
Keeping my fingers crossed that we can get everything done and get in for an appointment soon... also, that I get a positive OPK today.
I'm beginning to suspect that I might have low progesterone. Unfortunately, I can't talk to anyone about any of this until my husband does his test, and for some reason he isn't making it a very high priority. I realize going to the lab takes time and effort, but I've done it SO MANY TIMES lately I'm having a hard time feeling any sympathy for him. We both work full time - why is it so hard for him?
Keeping my fingers crossed that we can get everything done and get in for an appointment soon... also, that I get a positive OPK today.
Monday, August 11, 2014
HSG
Well, my HSG went well! Although that's not what I'm worried about at all. I had to drive out to a nearby city to have it done, because the local clinic was completely booked. My husband has been putting off his one-year checkup after breaking his leg last year, so I pressured him into scheduling an appointment at the same time, since his doctor moved out to the clinic in the other city and I wasn't sure I'd be up to driving myself home after the HSG. He managed to get an appointment, so the timing worked perfectly.
I was extremely worried about the HSG after reading other women's posts. I had an endometrial biopsy four years ago that left me crying for an hour afterwards and completely unable to get myself home, with no warning beforehand from the doctor's office about how painful and difficult it would be. When I was told to take four ibuprofen an hour before the HSG, I figured it must be worse than the biopsy. The good news is that my uterus looks fine (other than a small fibroid, which I already knew about) and my tubes are open. So I suppose as long as I have viable eggs and my husband has good healthy swimmers (keeping my fingers crossed) I should be able to get pregnant. Theoretically. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
I was extremely worried about the HSG after reading other women's posts. I had an endometrial biopsy four years ago that left me crying for an hour afterwards and completely unable to get myself home, with no warning beforehand from the doctor's office about how painful and difficult it would be. When I was told to take four ibuprofen an hour before the HSG, I figured it must be worse than the biopsy. The good news is that my uterus looks fine (other than a small fibroid, which I already knew about) and my tubes are open. So I suppose as long as I have viable eggs and my husband has good healthy swimmers (keeping my fingers crossed) I should be able to get pregnant. Theoretically. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
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